Goodbye My Lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

I am a dreamer and when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover....
Goodbye my friend....
You have been the one...
You have been the one for me...
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow ;(

^YOU^

Theres always something in the way...
Theres always something getting through....,
but it's not me,, it's You.... :)
Sometimes ignorance rings true..,
but hope is not in what i know,
it's not in me,,,, it's in You :)

It's all i know
I find peace when I'm confused..,
I find hope when
I'm let down..,
not in me ...,,
it's in you.. :)

I hope to lose myself for good...,
I hope to find it in the end..,
not in me,,,in You :)

Susahnya Jadi Guru

Jadi guru itu ternyata susah ya..
Apalagi guru yg perfect, yang ideal, yg disukai semua murid,, susahnya minta ampun dah!!
Kalau baik sama murid...,salah!
Kalau galak sama murid...,salah!
Kalau ramah sama murid...,salah!
Kalau sok cool sama murid...,juga salah!! Capeek deehh!!
Bingung jadinya mau membangun image awal sebagai guru di depan murid gimana,,
Apalagi image itulah yang akan diingat dan menjadi predikat sebagai guru selamanya..
Dan itu pilihan,,
Mau jd guru galak yg ditakuti dan dibenci murid,,
Atau jd guru baik yg disukai tapi tidak dihargai oleh murid...!
Mau pilih yg mana hayooo???
Pengennya psti jd guru yg baik tapi disegani sm murid,, tp itu SUSAH!!
Aaaarrrrggghhh!! Sampe skrg aja msh bingung dan belum bisa membangun imageku sbg guru,,padahal udh 7 bln jd guru!!! Hadeeeehhhhh..... :(

An Intersection

Sulit memang berada di posisi seperti ini..
Tidak mudah memutuskan di saat ada dua kubu yang sama-sama kuat.
Dan akan menyakitkan banyak pihak apabila hal itu telah diputuskan...
Banyak alasan lain yang harus dipikirkan dan dipertimbangkan untuk memutuskannya,,
Karena  ini akan berpengaruh besar bagi masa depanku...
Aku berharap semoga pilihanku tidak salah,
Dan yang aku pilih pun demikian...
SEMOGA!!!

When will I see you again??? 
You left with no goodbye, not a single word was said.... 
No final kiss to seal anything... 
I had no idea of the state we were in... 
I know I have a fickle heart and bitterness 
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head 
But don't you remember, don't you remember? 
The reason you loved me before, 
Baby please remember me once more. 
When was the last time you thought of me? 
Or have you completely erased me from your memories? 
I often think about where I went wrong. 
The more I do, the less I know. 
I gave you the space so you could breathe, 
I kept my distance so you would be free, 
I hope that you find the missing piece 
To bring you back to me. 
When will I see you again?

Telah lama aku bertahan
Demi cinta wujudkan sebuah harapan
Namun ku rasa cukup ku menunggu
Semua rasa tlah hilang
Sekarang aku tersadar
Cinta yang ku tunggu tak kunjung datang
Apalah arti aku menunggu
Bila kamu tak cinta lagi

Dahulu kaulah segalanya
Dahulu hanya dirimu yang ada di hatiku
Namun sekarang aku mengerti
Tak perlu ku menunggu sebuah cinta yang semu....

Bu guru cantik :)

gak terasa udah 2 bulan aku jadi guru di SMP Sint Carolus Bengkulu,,
udah 2 bulan juga aku udah bisa terima gaji dari hasil kerjaku setelah berhenti kerja jadi staf PKKN kampus...
aku banyak dipanggil 'bu guru cantik' sama murid-muridku...hahahaaa.... *besar kepala
banyak sekali perasaan yg aku alami...
marah, senang, jengkel, kesel, capek, bangga, dan masih bnyk lg..tergantung mood aku pas ngajar..
apalagi ngajar anak SMP... 
masa dimana mereka sudah tidak disebut anak, dan juga belum bisa disebut sebagai remaja...
serba salah bagaimana sikap kita mereka,,,
keras salah,,,lembut jg salah...
yaaahhhh...dinikmati sajalah...sudah pilihan hidupku ya seperti ini..
dan besok,,,setelah baru 2 bulan ngajar...,
aku akan di supervisi oleh yayasan pusat,, mending pusat bengkulu,, ini yayasan pusat dari jakarta!!!!!????
hadeeehhhhh.... Ya Tuhan...
kalau guru baru ntar bnyk yg salah dalam mengajar njuk pie bsok tanggapannya???
pasrah sajalah...toh besok bukan penilaian utk kenaikan pangkat,,,hahahahaa
semangat ya bu guru cantik :)